<< it doesn't haunt me like it did before >>

towards the end of act two, something happens to change the fortunes of the protagonist.

for me, if this has happened, it happened more quietly than i expected.

saying to me to sleep off the gin she touched my face, and then i said do you want to sleep in my bed with me, there being two of us in a room for five, and so she climbed into my gritty bed and we slept.

in the morning when she said, where did you come from, i said: some nowhere town.

in the evening she walked me to the goreme bus station.

as the bus pulled away under april rain, i wished i'd told the truth: i wished i'd said i'd fallen from heaven. i wished i'd said i was made of stardust. because i can speak so down about myself, little things that creep in and that i don't notice until it is too late, like that i am from some nowhere town. and i speak about my heart prosaically.

but my story is my own to tell, and i am what i make of me. and when i tell this story now, i say that i did not miss a beat to answer: where did i come from? i am just like that bird.

i feel lighter and more fearless.

act two, scene four: back in burhaniye. from here, downward motion til the start of act three. back home, my burning man ticket has arrived and i am making the plans i need to be able to ride my bike down to black rock city. i have found someone to transport my gear for me and all i had to do was ask. i am going to get there alone, under my own power, and what's more, strong and free. has omething in my fortune changed?